Fuck You Yelper

an exploration of the douchebaggery idiots commit when enabled with an internet connection, enough money for a meal, and a sense of entitlement.

Do not go there thinking they are really vegetarian-friendly in spite of the name. They don’t even have tofu on the menu for cryin’ out loud!!

Feeding food to animals that are killed is not sustainable. And certainly not TENDER OR GREEN!!

1-star review of Tender Greens (WeHo) by Vegan V.

I was walking by a dry cleaner at 3 a.m., and it said “Sorry, we’re closed.” You don’t have to be sorry. It’s 3 a.m., and you’re a dry cleaner. It would be ridiculous for me to expect you to be open. I’m not gonna walk by at 10 a.m. and say, “Hey, I walked by at 3, you guys were closed. Someone owes me an apology. This jacket would be halfway done!”

RIP Mitch Hedberg

tersaudades asked: I was excited by the idea of this Tumblr but half these entries are totally legit complaints. The guy who ordered the sandwich and received separately packaged slices of bread? How is he a douchebag? That place must really suck!

The review is for Bludso’s which is a great BBQ joint in South LA. The reason the bread is packaged separately is so that the sandwich doesn’t get soggy from all the BBQ sauce. It’s actually really considerate of them to do so. 

It bums me out that you think the place sucks based on that review.

I’ve been over there, and had a great time. Met w/ Mr. Bludso, talked about football and enjoyed some great BBQ that you really can’t get on my side of town.

Forget the review…if you’re ever in the area, try it for yourself:

http://www.yelp.com/biz/bludsos-bbq-compton 

Aside from the meat-heads/losers/scumbags who stand around in front all day and smoke cigars and tell stories about “beating that fool down and then saying, like, what up now!”, this place is pretty okay. But it is worth visiting only if you are desperate enough to deal with the lack of parking, jobless local residents/”background actors” and roving transplants from the East Coast and Scientology across the street.

2-star review of The Oaks Gourmet by Stef B.

This place is definitely not an AYCE if that is what you are looking forward to. Everything is ordered a la cart and each item is equivalent to one person at an AYCe Korean BBQ.

1-star review of Honey Pig by Connie H.

Don’t park here at night or they’ll tow your car like the asses they are.

1-star review of Bay Cities Italian Deli & Bakery by Andrew K.

I ordered the broiled crab cakes and they were really good and i called and asked if i could speak to the supervisor and the girl that asnswerd the phone wanted to know what it was in reference to and I told her it was regarding the food i ordered and and she said what was wrong with it and i said nothing i just wanted to let him or her know that it was good and then she was like ok hold on. When the manager got on the phone and i thanked him and let him know it was good he said thank you and you welcome but seemed like he was in a rush. I don’t think i will be eating their anymore because if the manager is not nice then what does that say about the business they are running and the people in it.

1-star review of Stratford Diner by Dalia B.

I walked through the door of this place and one look at the crowd was enough to convince me it wasn’t for me and I left. If you yelled “La Migra!” in there everyone would bolt for the back door. A little too autentico for my taste, but you could probably swing by there with your pickup truck to get some day laborers.

1-star review of Mariscos Las Palmas by J.W.

The crowd, okay I guess… mostly Asians and Mexicans, each ignoring each other. I meet one classy person though. Some chubby Mexican guy with a pierced lip, trendy hat and a neck tie walked into the bathroom, I was next in line. He walked straight up to the bathroom I told him the line started 10 people behind me. He asked me if I had ever been to prison, some place called “The Pit”. He then insisted I apologize to him… no way I am fighting a chubby Mexican with anger and fashion issues over a very dirty toilet!! Oh yeah and someone probably a relative of the same guy apparently mistaken the urinal for a toilet, party foul for going #2 in the urinal on a busy night…

2-star review of Broadway Bar by Charles P.